I often blog about how grief has impacted my life and for real, it helps my mental health. Today I’m blogging for my MH and my baby girls birthday. You were 35 days away from turning 5 years old when you left this earth and today you would be 8 and in the 2nd grade. … Continue reading Eight years with & without Livy
Time is the enemy
Dear Livy, I'm still here. It's been a season full of emotional ups and downs, but I'm here. December seems to be hardest to get through. It isn't the holidays alone that makes the month so daunting, it's the cold/flu season that runs through our house like ground hogs day combined with me constantly thinking … Continue reading Time is the enemy
Moments of You
Big and little things can hold so much meaning to a grieving mom. Things that no one would understand unless you’ve been here. Happy moments can become sad moments in a blink of an eye.
#ProtectOurCare
Dear Livy, Last week I was invited to share our families Medicaid story at Leader Pelosi's 53 Anniversary Medicaid Press Conference. It allowed me to share a piece of you with the rest of world. It's had over 25K views. Here's what I said. After being born with a disability to a teen mother with … Continue reading #ProtectOurCare
Rolling On
Dear Olivia, I pushed myself to smile and get through the day. I maneuvered my way through toxic attitudes and nastiness, but made it. I even went to a baseball game. Like most days, I reminded myself that grief is a lonely place and that many around me do not live in this space. Empathy … Continue reading Rolling On
Last Night
Dear Livy, I didn’t realize how much I really missed you, till I held you. I woke up and looked at my phone. It was 1:12am. I fell back to sleep almost immediately and then you were there. Great Aunt D and I were in a living room. Not ours and not one that I … Continue reading Last Night
Silence
Dear Olivia, I am reminded of you through everything I do. Sometimes it’s really hard for me to sit through a presentation or meeting knowing the subject of the meeting would have impacted your quality of life. A career in disability rights isn’t always easy. Our family lives, breaths and believes in everything that we … Continue reading Silence
Letters of Healing
Dear Livy, I’m sitting somewhere between how did I get here and where do I go next. I’ve come to know this place as part of my life. It’s what I refer to as my healing journey. It keeps me waking up and moving forward....sometimes. If there is one thing grief has taught me, it … Continue reading Letters of Healing
Our first year apart
Dear Livy, I wish you were here, but maybe you are here. I'm pretty sure it was you that turned the patio strand of lights on...not once, not twice, but three times! Who else would turn the lights on at 6am from the backyard while your daddy and I sat at the kitchen table drinking … Continue reading Our first year apart
Still Leading On
Dear Livy, Some say that the first year is the hardest. Others say the second year is harder because friends and family forget and stop checking in to asking how you’re doing. I can’t imagine the pain being any worse than it already is and I also can’t picture those who have been by my … Continue reading Still Leading On